This is the kind of night that many of my nights felt like as a teenager. Quiet, but with so much going on outside of me that I’m not a part of. My roommates seem busy and have curled up in their room watching TV and playing video games and James is sitting at the desk that is comically small for him, hunched over his computer, trying to focus on schoolwork. So, I found myself lighting a candle, pouring a glass of whiskey, putting on some lo-fi, and opening a book. A common teenage r[...]
Valentine’s Day has come and gone, and I hardly even noticed it. There’s something funny that happens with Valentine’s Day when you’re with a person who is so full of love, your heart fills up and spills over with all of the joy it can handle every single day. For those of you who have been reading my blog from the beginning, you know it’s been a wild ride for the last handful of years. If you know me in real life, you probably have heard me say cynical things (or maybe just strictly r[...]
As a kid growing up in the church, I learned early on that the solution to any problem could be found with prayer and petition, reading the Bible, and having enough faith. As a teenager struggling with anxiety, an emotionally abusive boyfriend, my parents’ divorce and a ton of school work, I struggled to see how I could be doing everything right and still feel so anxious all of the time. I was convinced I was doing something wrong. And then came college. My anxiety waned and rose, seemed to ru[...]
“Darling, just fucking own it.” These words are engraved on a bracelet my roommate gave me for Christmas. If I could choose any words to sum up the close of 2017, it would be these. As another year ends, I can’t help but think about how exhausted I am. I know, I’m supposed to say how great the year was or how I can’t wait for the next year to come because it’s going to be full of so many good things. And those things are true, most definitely. A lot of 2017 was amazing (I went on li[...]